HORSEPUCKY!

Hey gang. This hideous blog post may disappoint some who expect a lot more from ole’ Blithering Idiot than she’s got to give about now.

I haven’t written any pithy narratives lately mostly due to personal matters and that pesky day job taking up most of my time and energy.

Even today, I do not have enough in the tank to do the kind of job I would normally like shedding light on the insidious crapola coming from the right. Quite honestly, I don’t think I could have kept up with the 24 hour news cycle shifts that went on this past week anyway.

It was a week that started out with the right, oh how do I say this delicately, practically writhing in orgasmic pleasure over the supposed SCANDALS! cropping up left and right (no pun intended) that made it look like Obama is bad…really, really, bad (Michael Jackson).

However, as of this writing, it seems the right have made much ado about nothing (Shakespeare).

But as most of my Facebook and Twitter friends know all too well from my spastic and annoying penchant for posting 20 times in a span of an hour, that does not mean that I’ve stopped focusing on what’s been swirling around in the political universe.

In between sips of my homemade smoothies (who knew kale was so darn yummy when pulverized to smithereens?), and ass-kicking workouts (down a full 5 pounds this morning thank you very much), and thinking up interesting ways to impart Shakespeare to a bunch of grumpy teenagers ready to sleep til noon and hit the beach for summer break, I just haven’t had the gumption to sit and spend hours thinking up ways to tell you how much Teapublican Conservaputzes suck.

But suck they do. I mean they suck hard. Really, really, super-suck. Like to the nth power suck.

I tell ya folks, I try… I really do… I try like hell to be somewhat witty and make passing attempts at being a tad humorous when I bash ’em. I kid, I mock, and I figure it’s a lot more better to expose them in that way than the way I would really like to sometimes (yeah, I know that ain’t good English, but I’m tired man. Just dog-tired).

But today, I’ve gotta tell you, I’m really about done with their bull-shit. Finito.

I can’t get any more real and less funny than that, and honest to God, I don’t find the incessant lying and hyperbole and middle-school rumor-mill reporting at all humorous.

I’m done with these politicians,  pundits and talking heads in right-wing world who have now just totally shattered any shred of confidence or trust that anyone should have in them. Honestly, if you believe a thing most of them say, then there is no hope for you.

These people are not at all interested in truth-seeking, they are interested in promoting a false narrative…and are quite willing to throw out lies and innuendo daily to see what sticks. They must believe that Americans are really that dumb and pliable and cannot see through their pathetic smear campaigns against the President.

Because it’s apparent, that in the last week of scandalpalooza, they have all exposed their bloated, scuzzy, slimy underbellies for the world to see.

Look, I know you haven’t been living under a rock and you know the trifecta of supposed SCANDALS! that one Barack Hussein Obama has supposedly had his dirty little Muslim-socialist-Kenyan hands in.

Sure guys, don’t you know? Obama, before he got done not funding extra security for our personnel serving overseas, then allowing 4 Americans to die in Libya because he refused to send help, had made a call to the IRS and directed them to audit only Tea Party groups for their (cough-cough) “social welfare” 501 (c) (4) tax-exempt status. But before that even, he directed the Justice Department to spy on all reporters because he is the vilest ( darkest) president ever in the recorded history of our country.

I’m also pretty sure he has something to do with the kidnapping of Lindberg’s baby and may have forced the captain of the Titanic to ignore warnings and smack right into that iceberg.

I mean, “some people say…” he may have had a hand in those things.

I smell a possible hearing…I mean after the House tries to repeal an un-repealable law such as…oh I don’t know…Obamacare …for the 867 millionth time.

Good use of your time and our money, idiots.

You see friends, when you live in right-wing world, truth, proportion, temperance, forbearance, and common-sense is unnecessary. Those traits are actually unwelcome.

You must, and I mean, must, froth at the mouth and practically bust a move, do the worm or whatevah, because AHA! you have found something– anything– to perchance be able to waggle a finger at and scream IMPEACH!

The real truth is,  each supposed SCANDAL! has now been either debunked or investigated to the point where there is not one iota, not one scintilla, not one damned fingerprint of the President on them.

But by all means all of you right-wing, fear-mongering, lying, scheming bastages (Johnny Dangerously), don’t let truth, justice, or the American way (Superman) stop you from ginning up, in the most pathetic and transparent way possible, faux OUTRAGE!

I do not have the time nor energy to write about each specific issue from the three supposed SCANDALS! that are supposed to bring down the Obama presidency.

But for those of you reading this who watch only that channel that starts with “F” and ends with “X”, I will provide links that will let the air out of your tires faster than a box ‘o’ nails fallen from a 1989 pick-up truck with a “Don’t Tread on Me” bumper sticker affixed to its back window.

BENGHAZI SCANDAL!Hey guess what? Not only have the Teapublicans attempted to smear good, intelligent, and patriotic people like Susan Rice, they have actually been proven to be the ones who wouldn’t fund more money for embassy security, and now, somebody with an “R” next to their name actually doctored emails to make the Whitehouse look like they were lying. WHICH THEY WEREN’T. Oh, and former Defense Secretary Gates, who served under both Bush and Obama, said that he would have made the same decisions in Benghazi and that a lot of loudmouth stiffs have a “cartoonish impression of military capabilities.”

The military command both on the ground and in the Pentagon assessed there was not enough time to get substantial help to the situation and were wary of taking forces from other areas in potential target zones, and in the words of Air Force Major Rob Firman who spoke to the US News and World Report,

“Were these guys told not to do anything? No. They were in Tripoli, supporting the U.S. security in Tripoli, and they were told to stay there,” Firman says. Special Operations Command Africa leadership told them to remain where they were, and “it was more important for those guys to be in Tripoli.”  He added, “I look at that as not so much a stand-down order, as it is a ‘stay where you are,'” says Firman. “Those guys met the planes and continued to support.”

Firman adds that the C-130 was tasked with picking up the American personnel at the Benghazi airport and leave immediately. These Special Forces troops would not have been on the ground long enough to have contributed significantly to the operation.

“There was a very limited amount of time that they could have done anything,” he says.

Guess what news outfit did not so much as mention that the decision was military based and not Obama willy-nilly deciding to “stand-down” as has been stealthily repeated as fact instead of the lie it is? Three guesses and the first two don’t count.

B’ut, but, I will continue to make hay out of it anyway because ‘Obama sucks’, said the outraged Tea-Party member holding his misspelled sign who doesn’t have a freaking clue where Benghazi is.

IRS SCANDAL! Yes, yes. We all hate the IRS. Why, it’s almost un-American to not despise those folks. PITCH-FORKS! TORCHES! (Every Frankenstein movie). While we’re at it, SWIMMING POOLS! MOVIE STARS! (The Beverly Hillbillies). And yes, yes, on the face of it, it looks like they were not politically correct and a little sloppy in the execution of their cited tasks. HOWEVER, the IG has investigated and there is not one link to anything political—let alone some directive from the Whitehouse on this. And get this, the head of the agency was a Bush appointee who had republican ties.  Oh, and every damn Tea Party group who applied got their bogus tax-exempt status approved but guess what other groups were also audited and got shot down? The left, that’s who! By the way, the IRS does us all a favor when it does its job and for my money, they SHOULD be looking at all of these groups who are pretending to be “non-political.” Right Karl Rove?

AP PHONE RECORD SCANDAL! Ok, this one I have to admit, makes me squeamish. The right to have a free and unencumbered press is vital to our security as a free people (fuck your guns, the pen is mightier than the sword). That being said, the circumstances that led to this step being taken by the DOJ also makes me rumbly in my tumbly (Winnie-the Pooh) because that right does not mean that others lives should be put at risk or our vital national security either. However, once again, this was a separate issue which has no connection to Pennsylvania Avenue. Hey, if that changes, I’ll be glad to write a retraction, but for now, there’s nothing there to connect the DOJ to the Whitehouse. Besides, what the DOJ was not illegal. They didn’t wire-tap as I’ve heard and read many dumb-dumbs repeat. They subpoenaed phone records. I would have felt better had they received a warrant.

And last, but not least, I leave you with the right’s own words on how to run a country in 2013. In essence, it should be the job of Congress to do nothing to get the country moving forward. Do nothing to help the unemployment numbers tick down faster. Do nothing to focus on our huge environmental concerns. Do nothing to reduce poverty, crime, blah-blah-blah. That’s kid-stuff.

Instead, just keep these words scrolling in the news crawl of right-wing television day and night:

SCANDAL!

BENGHAZI!

IRS CONSERVATIVE WITCH-HUNT!

OBAMA IS A CANNIBAL!

Okay. I made that last one up.

And forget about doing the work of the American people for the betterment of the American people. Instead right-wing, do this: From The Grio:

In light of the white hot media spotlight on the administration, and to deflect attention from the many policy areas where Republicans don’t quite get along, the letter urges: “it is incumbent upon the House of Representatives to conduct oversight hearings on those actions, but it would be imprudent to do anything that shifts the focus from the Obama administration to the ideological differences within the House Republican Conference.”

“To that end, we urge you to avoid bringing any legislation to the House Floor that could expose or highlight major schisms within the conference.  Legislation such as the Internet sales tax or the FARRM Act which contains nearly $800 billion in food stamp spending, would give the press a reason to shift their attention away from the failures of the Obama administration to write another ‘circular firing squad’ article.”

Yes, that was an excerpt from a real letter just sent to Boehnor and Cantor from the right-wing think-tank (oxymoron) the Heritage Foundation. Their advice?

Screw America, we want SCANDAL!

Screw America, we want to spread lies and mis-information and run with it 24/7!

Screw America, we want IMPEACHMENT! trials and hearings to encompass our every waking hour so we can avoid actually legislating!

…even if what we are trying to peddle is all a bunch of damn horespucky (Colonel Potter-M.A.S.H.).

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About Blithering Idiot

I am a teacher and I love my job.
This entry was posted in Benghazi, conservatives, Fox News Channel, Humor, Obamacare, Republicans and Fear, Tea Party and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to HORSEPUCKY!

  1. Rich Steck says:

    Well put – and let’s hope the R’s and TP’ers don’t take satire and sarcasm for honest opinion!

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