So let me get this right. Chris Christie, the bombastic, straight-shootin’, finger-waggin’, public service employee hatin’, conservative media darling of the country missed the massive and paralyzing snowstorm in New Jersey by mere hours? You say he made it to the magical land of Disney just in the nick of time? Whew. But don’t worry you slobs from “Joisey”, since 2009 we now have a lieutenant-governor to run things smoothly when you are on a much deserved break from your daily duties of teacher-bashing, working on tax-cuts for millionaires, and public sector employee- jobs/benefits/pension-slashing.
What’s that ya say? Lt. Gov Kim Guadagno is ALSO out-of-state- on a little R&R with her family too? Mexico I hear? Huh. I’m sorry. I was under the impression that the whole reason that we voted on a ballot initiative to name a Lt. Gov. was precisely so that when the Governor died or was out-of-state, we would have a figure capable and ready to tackle any issues that may crop up. I mean, here are Guadagno’s words after her appointment, “I do have an idea of his vacation schedule,” she said, laughing,”…My job is to stand in for the governor. So when he is out of town, I will follow all of the principles Chris has run on as a campaigner and will follow as he’s the governor.”
So what gives Governor? Wait. I think I know. It has become quite apparent that you had ample warning of this snowstorm and chose to give a big middle finger to the citizens that you claim to want to help so much through your charming and no-nonsense leadership. You clearly shirked your responsibility to be in your state during an emergency. Additionally, you were derelict in your duties as Governor by allowing your second-in-command to be out of the state the same exact time as you. That was a simple fix, and you either didn’t care to fix it, or were unaware of this problem, in which case, you are not the “Great Kazoo” that everyone thinks you are. Your public statement, while cryptically telling us all to “chill-out, I mean what’s the big friggin’ deal? IT SNOWS in Jersey ya know?”, was a nice try at diverting the slings and arrows that are heading your way.
The truth is Governor Christie, you have been telling us teachers and cops and fireman to stop whining, bite-the-bullet, and do what’s right for New Jersey. But the very first moment you had to prove that you were willing to sacrifice for the good of us, the citizens who pay YOUR salary, you booked. It’s okay. The truth is, who needs ya anyway Gov? Hey, we had Corey Booker delivering diapers to stranded moms in Newark. And those civil service workers you dislike so much were out there plowing your streets for ya. The cops and fireman were battling the elements to do their jobs to keep people safe for ya. You just stay put and make sure you put plenty of sunscreen on. Wouldn’t want you to get a nasty sunburn. Oh, and I hope your streets are plowed. Fuhgettaboutit.